Families + Screens: It’s a Balancing Act

Parents today share many challenges when it comes to raising happy healthy children. One of those challenges includes the use of technology.  According to the Pew Research Center, two-thirds of parents in the US say that parenting is harder today than it was 20 years ago, citing technology as the reason. ​

​Screens aren’t good or bad. They are a tool we use in daily life. Mindful technology use and conversations around family values and screen use help make technology a benefit rather than conflict for families. As with most things in life, finding a balance is best. We all have a finite amount of time each day. How we use that time is important. We know many things are key to raising healthy, well-adjusted children. Things like spending face-to-face time together, exercise, play, school, activities, eating and sleeping. We can think about whether screens are happening in addition to these things, or instead of these things. That can help us determine whether technology use in our home is in balance, or whether technology is replacing some other critical experiences. 

Another key reason for balance is brain development. We learn what we practice and in childhood and adolescence, the human brain undergoes major transformation, pruning and growing connections based on experiences. Like the path through the field in this image, our brain builds paths, using the skills and networks that we practice the most. To develop a more balanced brain, we need a variety of experiences.

Often, when it comes to balancing screen time, parents hear a lot about “what not to do”. The SPOIL system takes a different approach in that it tells parents “what to do”. This system was developed by Dr. Meghan Owenz and is based on the latest screen time and child development research. The SPOIL system prioritizes children’s play and focuses on what parents can do with their children to help them thrive in a digital world. ​

​The SPOIL System outlines the five most important activities you should engage in with your young child each day. These activities include:

  1. Social activities – A strong relationship with an adult leads to better behavior, calmer and happier children, who experience less stress. Social interaction with siblings and friends builds cooperation, empathy and perspective-taking. Face to face interactions are the primary way that children develop social skills.​
  2. Play activities– Imaginative play is critically important for children – this type of play has been linked to better impulse control and attention span​
  3. Outdoor activities– There is so much research on the benefits of being outside for mental and physical health. Regardless of the weather! It leads to better sleep, decreased stress and increased problem solving​
  4. Independent work– Includes things your child can accomplish by themselves and therefore make them feel more confident and competent. Independent work might include homework, helping a sibling, personal hygiene, age-appropriate chores. ​
  5. Literacy activities– Includes anything that helps a child enjoy reading and writing. The benefits of daily reading are well documented. ​

As parents, if we focus on integrating these five habits into our child’s day, it is going to have a much bigger impact on their well-being than simply limiting their amount of screen-time. It is about focusing on what your child is doing, not what they’re not doing.

For more information on Extension parenting resources and programs please contact carol.bralich@wisc.edu or check here for a listing of programs.

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